Just Another Day at Work

So I love my job. I've been here for over 8 years, and after starting off by answering the phones and making files, the company grew, I grew with it, and now I'm part of design group. Basically, it's all the smart people (and me) working in a big room with six cubes, lots of computers, and an immense amount of nerdy conversation. There's five of us - three engineers, a programmer, and me. I draw pictures. I think the only reason I'm back here is because they needed my old office for someone else. And there was an empty desk. 

But that's neither here nor there. I'm part of design group, and today my fellow smart people and I were discussing why the one empty desk is the worst place to sit in the whole office. 

Your back would face the door. Nightmare. Did I mention we have security cameras in the office? Your back would also face the camera - it's the ONLY desk back here that you can even SEE on the camera. And no, we don't have anything in the office to merit the 12+ cameras that were installed. What we do have is a boss who likes to play god. But it's okay, because he's awesome. No really. Certain people call him Captain Awesome.

So we're discussing the crap desk:

Daniel: When my wife and I go to restaurants we always fight over the seat that faces the door.

Matt: It's a proven study that mammals need to face the door, or it can cause a large amount of stress.

Me: I read CIA spy thriller save the world novels, and the guy in those books ALWAYS has to have his back to the wall so he can keep an eye on the room. You know, in case anyone wants to blow the place up or release a biotoxin. So that's why I always sit facing the door. In case I need to save the world.

Silence.

I love my job.

I'll Have Another Derby Day

(I realize that having a blog means you need to ACTUALLY blog ... working on that one)

ANYWAY, Derby Day was this weekend! Derby Day is a super fun event where you wear a big hat, watch the Kentucky Derby, and drink free drinks. And by free, I mean pay $60 for a ticket and THEN eat and drink whatever you want all day. And by $60 I mean a $60 donation to the Shepherd Spinal Center. So basically you are helping save the world while concurrently drinking for free. It's a win win.

So Megan, Karly, and I hopped on a bus to head to a big field with tents and pink koozies and alcohol. Brett was supposed to go, but he bailed at the last minute - leaving me sans Bus Buddy. Apparently I am the only one who freaks out about this shit. So before we got on the bus, I explained to my dear friend Megan just how concerned I was over NOT having a Bus Buddy. She gave me a weird look, told me I was stupid, and then gave me Karly. SAVED. Actually, she said, "Psah. You can have Karly, and I can hope a cute boy will want to sit next to me."

We were the last ones on the bus ... and upon climbing on the bus, Megan said to the first cute boy we passed, "Oh! Is anyone sitting here?" He said yes. We sat by the bathrooms and drank champagne. Still a win.

Here's our posse:

That's Rich (Mary Beth's "21"-year old brother), Mary Beth, Karly, Megs, P Wack, and me. They made me squat. Assholes. Patrick is wearing a Derby Day t-shirt because he actually volunteered to WORK the thing. He is saving the world way more than my $60 donation. He also gave us free koozies.

After wandering around, drinking, not bidding on the silent auction, drinking, eating, and drinking, we plopped down at a table to play drinking games. All a 20 21-year-old has to do is MENTION drinking games, and the 30-year-olds nearby will come running. And we did. We played Ring/Circle of Death/Fire ... but the name isn't important. The important part was the rule that said every time you drink you have to make a farting sound. It was amazing.

And then my favorite part of the whole day happened. A Random College Aged Looking Guy (RCALG) came over and asked if we wanted to play Cornhole. Megan said yes and dragged Karly along for the ride. 5 minutes of cornhole later, Megs skips back to our table to recant her conversation with RCALG:

RCALG: So, how old are you?

Megs: Ohhhh, I bet you're just a baby ... how old are YOU?

RCALG: 23.

Megs: OH! That's not bad! I mean, I'm 26.

Then she went back to play cornhole. Then Mary Beth, Rich, and I yelled "THIRTY! CAN I GET A 3-0?!?! THIIIRRRRTYYYY!!!!" for the next 15 minutes. Then we laughed at how freaking hilarious we are and complimented each other on being so original.

Then Karly came back and told us that 2 sorority girls just came over to the the guy she was playing cornhole with and said, "Hey, you know that girl (Megan) playing cornhole with RCALG - well she told him she was 26, and she's really 30." Then we laughed some more, yelled THIRTY about 26 more times, and called it a day. My friends fucking rock.

PS: MY HORSE WON! I pick strictly by the names, so a horse called I'll Have Another is CLEARLY my guy. Not that horses like Rousing Sermon and Gemologist weren't top contenders as well. WTF?